Ofteborg in Ruins, Innocent Citizens Slaughtered in Titanic Blast

Mikkelsensborg, 6th may 1750

The Butcher, Brigadier MacDrum of Dal Riata, looks on and laughs at the screams of innocents murdered by the explosion of the magazine at Ofteborg.

The Butcher, Brigadier MacDrum of Dal Riata, looks on and laughs at the scene of carnage caused by the explosion of the magazine at Ofteborg.

The whole of Europia is stunned as we learn of the terrible events in the south of our country that took place yesterday.

Ofteborg, sturdy fortress town and home to thousands of peaceful citizens, as well as a brave garrison of some 7,000 men, has been obliterated by a catastrophe of proportions beyond human comprehension. And once again, the Butcher of Knudsenhaven none other than Brigadier MacDrum of Dal Riata, is the agent of the Devil in this monstrous outrage.

Surrounded by the enemy, the brave souls in Ofteborg had resisted all calls to surrender and had placed their trust in the magnificent defences of the town. Any enemy commander with sense, let alone a sense of decency, would have left the town in peace, but instead, under the overall command of the Grenouissian puppet Von Slivovitz of St Paul, the Mad Murderer was let loose with a battery of howitzers, which rained shells down upon the town.

It seems that one of these shells, fizzing and careering across the rooftops near the garrison’s magazine, must have taken the most extraordinarily fortuitous bounce, perhaps through a skylight or an inadvertently unattended doorway. Be that as it may, at 4pm yesterday, the earth was rocked by the largest explosion ever witnessed in living memory. Onlookers were blinded by the flash, knocked flat by the blast wave for a distance of several miles, and deafened by the colossal report, which shattered windows as far away as Taageland and Lit de la Riviere.

The losses are staggering. It is estimated that perhaps more than three quarters of the garrison and citizens of Ofteborg lost their lives. Masonry and bodies rained down for miles around, a grisly and deadly storm, as a result of which many onlookers, including the cowardly enemy, lost their lives. Livestock and crops have been lost in uncounted numbers.

But just as the enemy have visited this disaster upon our people, so shall they reap what they have sown. A sentence of death is hereby passed upon MacDrum and any of his men, and both soldier and citizen are called upon to carry out the sentence upon him or the dogs he calls his men, who clearly have no more conscience than the Butcher himself.

We are the Borg. We shall have vengeance.

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